brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
