I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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