I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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