The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
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