I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Randomize
