ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
