Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Randomize