I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
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