my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
