The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
