Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Randomize
