you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
