i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
