hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
