Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
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