brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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