i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize
