do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
Let's paint friendship bongs
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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