so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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