first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Randomize
