apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
