i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
