Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
