Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
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