Three words: puerto rican gang bang
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
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