i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize