get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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