You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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