You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
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