It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
