You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize