There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize