Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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