I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Randomize
