Plan B is the new Plan A
just come out here and I will go home with you...
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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