You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
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