Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
