O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Found the puke drawer
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
