If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
