I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize