God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize
