Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Randomize
