...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
