Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(317): View more from Indiana

It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.

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(760): View more from California

Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.

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(856): View more from New Jersey

my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.

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(812): View more from Indiana

well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.

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(989): View more from Michigan

What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night

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(203): View more from Connecticut

Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights

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(620): View more from Kansas

There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions

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(713): View more from Texas

Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....

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