Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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