i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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