Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
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