This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
Randomize
