why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Randomize
