She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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