return my video game
Dude my mom stole all your condoms
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
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