saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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